Sunday, September 15, 2013

Support System Sunday

-->According to the Bible, it is our responsibility to console, support and protect others during hard times.

Gal. 6:2 tells us: Go on carrying the burdens of one another, and thus fulfill the law of the (Divine Light/) Christ

Each of us can contribute to the well-being and growth of those around us, and beyond.  How do we do accomplish this responsibility?  We do this by striving to be, at all times, a source of encouragement and spiritual refreshment to others.

So, then, let us pursue the things making for peace and the things that are upbuilding to one another. Rom. 14:19   Above all things, have intense love for one another, because love covers a multitude of sins.  Be hospitable to one another without grumbling.  In proportion as each one has received a gift, use it in ministering to one another as fine stewards of God’s undeserved kindness expressed in various ways.  1 Peter 4: 8-10

Let us always be ready and willing to assist others.  Let us share as much as we can, as circumstances allow.   Let us be cheerful givers.  

2 Corinthians 9:6-7 reminds us: But as to this, he that sows sparingly will also reap sparingly; and he that sows bountifully will also reap bountifully. Let each one do just as he has resolved in his heart, not grudgingly or under compulsion, for God loves a cheerful giver. 

It is up to each us to do the work to connect with others; no one can do it for us.  Sometimes this responsibility to our brothers and sisters can feel overwhelming, especially when fulfilling this responsibility interferes with our own wants and/or needs.  When this happens, let us remember that we are never really alone; the Creator/God, the Divine Light/Jesus and other Spirits are with us.  
Let us take our problems to the Creator/God.  Just as it is up to each us to do the work to connect with others, it is up to each of us to make the connection with the Creator/God.  Sometimes we allow ourselves to get so disconnected and frazzled that we can not reconnect.  The Creator/God knows this and recommends having a support system; it is vital to our success.   Success in most endeavors is a team effort, not a solo performance.      
Proverbs 15:22 states: There is a frustrating of plans where there is no confidential talk, but in the multitude of counselors there is accomplishment. 

A support system is a network of people who interact and remain in informal communication for mutual assistance; members of the network provide practical, emotional and/or spiritual support which sustains other members in their survival and growth, on an as needed basis. 

Successful support systems typically consist of a minimum of 3 people.   There are 2 main, beneficial, reasons for this:

1.     No one is available 24/7; the more people in our support system, the better chance we have of receiving the assistance we perceive we need. We will not always be there to shield others from life’s challenges. 
2.     When we stay focused on the goal of teaching another to stand on his/her own two feet, we are given the opportunity to help empower them.   

To help us stay focused on this goal, we can ask ourselves the following questions:
1.     What can the person asking for help reasonably do on their own? 
2.     Are there things we (the support system) are doing for this person, that they could do for themselves?   If yes, work with the person until sure that they can handle the responsibility on their own. 
3.     How much can each of us reasonably assist this person?
4.     What are our own personal boundaries?
5.     What are our support system group boundaries?
6.     What are the consequences to individual group members, the group at large and to the other person if the boundaries are not respected? Outline potential consequences of actions: good and bad.  In a very covert way, accepting the consequences of our actions helps us learn to rely on support only when necessary.  A good support person will not support a brother or sister in staying stuck.

For each one will carry his own load. Galatians 6:5

At times, we all need support. Let us never hesitate to accept help when struggling to cope.  Keep in mind, however, that if we do not trust a person, they really have no place in our support system.  People in our support system are the people, who, over time, get to know us; the real us.  In an effort to receive assistance, we often find ourselves sharing dis-harmonious/dis-eased thoughts and/or gut-wrenching emotions.  We must be able to trust those with whom we open up to and share our real “earthly” selves with. 

If a support person offers suggestions or options to assist us, we may choose to ignore them … If 2 support people tell us the same thing, it is usually in our best interest to listen … If 3 or more support people tell us the same thing, it is in our best interest to quit whining and take action by following or trying any suggestions or options given. 

Not all options or suggestions given, will work.  This does not mean that we should not do the footwork and try to implement them though.  When we shoot them down automatically, we disrespect and thereby abuse one or more members of our support system.   Let us be willing to do whatever it takes to move forward. 

Let us always accept any support we receive, with appreciation.  Let us never be demanding when asking others to help us handle our problems. Let us be reasonable in how much of their time and attention we expect them to give us.  Let us remember that our brothers and/or sisters may be unable to meet our needs.    

When this happens, let us continue to take our problems to the Creator/God and have faith that the Creator/God will sustain us in whatever trials we may face.

Whether we are giving or receiving help, let us do so in the right spirit.

So it is, sealed in trust, faith and truth, in the Sacred Divine Light/Jesus. Amen.

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